Monte Carlo Series D

The Series D for Monte Carlo lands in that uncomfortable middle ground where you can't call it genius or catastrophe. ICONIQ, GGV Capital are deploying $135M at $1.6B, which feels like a price negotiated by people who read the same three analyst reports and decided to split the difference. data observability theater—that's literally what they're betting on. The enterprise thesis makes sense on a whiteboard, but the execution risk is substantial and the competitive moat is more of a competitive puddle. Will this work? Maybe. Will early investors get liquidity? Eventually. Will anyone remember this deal in five years? Absolutely not.